Monday, February 1, 2010

There's an Alien in my Boob.

Seriously- there is something bizarre going on in my left "foobie". The best way to describe it is this: if my left boob were a pregnant belly, there would be a 8 month old fetus growing inside, kicking it's foot into my armpit and making weird pointy shapes where it SHOULD be round. The right boob apparently got the memo and is a nice round-ish shape. The left one is like an isosceles triangle:
Today was expander fill #2. It was, uh, interesting.

1. Lilly came with me. Those that know her will understand without further explanation. For those of you who don't know her- she's 3. She will be 4 in a month. She doesn't listen, touches everything and doesn't stop saying mommy- look at this, mommy - what is that, mommy- do they have a potty, mommy- do you have a tissue, mommy - do you have candy, mommy, mommy, mommy. So the waiting room wait consisted of her climbing underneath chairs and hiding a rubber door stop. The exam room wait consisted of me showing her pictures on my Blackberry.

2. I took a picture of the needle that goes into my boobs. For size comparison- on the far right is the cap of a bold Sharpie marker.

3. While I was laying on the procedure table and my surgeon was injecting me with 60cc of saline with the gigantic needle, Lilly was holding my hand, being so caring and loving. She was saying "it's ok mommy, you hold my hand, don't be scared. THEN- she "accidentally" put her foot on the "up/down" pedal and UP went the table. The scene from Pulp Fiction where Uma Thurman gets the adrenaline shot in the heart flashed before me. Needless to say, everything was fine, after all my Plastic Surgeon IS a professional. Lilly on the other hand got yelled at. Big time.

All in all, it was pretty pain-free today. Just a little sore, mostly because I keep poking the "triangle" trying to "pop" it out of this funky form. I'm thinking maybe I can jiggle it around or do some jumping jacks and move the saline to the side and fix it. Otherwise I'll just have to wait until next week for fill #3.

Something REALLY funny did happen today. When Lilly and I got back from the PS, I let the dog outside. While I was doing this, Lilly went into to the bathroom. I knocked on the door and asked if I could come in. (note to parents- any time a 3 year old is in the bathroom and the door is shut, beware of what you might see on the other side.) Anyway- Lilly said I could come in, so as I crack the door, I see her sitting on the toilet, pooping, and flipping through a Bass Pro catalog.

1 comment:

Kathie Quinn said...

I'm betting you were grateful they were Mike's fishing mags and not playboys. THAT would have been awesome though...